I can always tell on a Saturday at the Bellevue Hill store when it's going to be a really troubling and upsetting day.
"Where are ya cold cases of cider champ"
(Obviously, like any normal genuine functioning member of society,I immensely dislike it when I'm called champ. Or buddy, or pally, or busta, or fella, or big guy, or cobba, or big mac, or big fella, or sport, or big man, or sunny, or squire, or boss. I could go on).
They are not talking about good cider, they are referring cold cases of something which tastes just plain horrible.
They are usually, and I'm massively pigeonholing (great Australian past time) here ; wearing their sunglasses on inside, attire of a singlet or shirtless, shoeless or thongs.
Usually have come straight out of the annual General Pants fashion catalogue.
Possibly accompanied by the famed flat rimmed American sports team Baseball, NFL, NHL, NBA cap, so on and so forth.
This all generally happens when it's warmer weather. Y'know, douchbag weather.
The kind of amateur drinking weather that is Hahn Super Dry or God save us, Corona drinking weather. Of Which both sell well in summer.
For lesser folk than you and I. That consume for terrible taste and inebriation rather than taste, fulfilment, enjoyment, love, disgust and obviously, inebriation.
Always out in force, in the warmer weather.
Always some ghastly music festival on to smatter their terrible lives against the wall for.
" we're going to 'WE LOVE'?" or "tell me your going to 'FUTURE'?".
I have absolutely no idea what acronym and nicknames you have for silly music festivals, you utter scum.
All you need to know is that we got some new French ciders that unlike most of the cider we sell that looks great and tastes like poo.
These French Beauties look impressive and taste like Venus De Milo.
A list of the new cider and our currant range are the following (#New Arrivals) :
#Le Pere Jules Cidre Bouché Pays D'Auge
#LA POMMERAIE Cidre Brut Artisanal de Normandie- Dry
#LA POMMERAIE Cidre Doux- Normandy Semi -Dry
#Fernand et Frères Poiré
Le Pere Jules Poire (Perry-Pear wine) Pays D'Auge.
Victor Gontier Cidre Bouche Fermier Domfrontais (Apple)
Cidre de Cornouailles Cornwall Brittany (Apple)
Cidre traditionnel d'Anneville (Apple)
Comte Louis de Lauriston Poire (Perry/Pear Cider)
Eric Bordelet Sydre Argelette (Apple)
Eric Bordelet Poire Granit (Perry/Pear Cider) Fu*%ing Amazing!
Eric Bordelet Sydre Brut Tendre (Apple)
Small Acres Dry Sparkling
Small Acres Medium Dry Still
Small Acres Medium Still
Small Acres Medium Sweet (Frizzante)
Small Acres Dry Sparkling Rose
Small Acres Ice Wine Cyder
Thorogoods Medium Dry Spakling
Thorogoods Medium Sweet Sparkling
Thorogoods Dry Sparkling
Thorogoods Sweet Scrumpy Still
Thorogoods Meduim Dry Scrumpy Still
Thorogoods Dry Scrumpy Still
Thorogoods Medium Sweet scrimpy Still
Thorogoods Sweet Apple Liquor
Thorogoods Apple Chocolat Liquor
Cidre Dupont Organic
Cidre Dupont Bouche Fermier
Cidre Dupont Vintage (Aged in Calvados Barrels)
Cidre Dupont Cuvee Colette 2006
Any cider you wish to try please call in advance to see we have it in stock, I can always bring it from one store to the other.